Forever Tainted

Monday of this week was by far the worst workday of my entire professional life. From the moment ‘I got into the office’ (I don’t actually physically go into my office, I remote in from home) until the moment I left it seemed my boss was kicking my ass. Add to that multiple technical issues and system malfunctions and the day chopped up to pure hell. The rest of this week has followed the same suit. My stress levels are through the roof and it seems in my history with this company, they get that way once or twice a year. Stress is causing me to be careless, to miss the obvious and to offer below-personal-standard results to any task. I am making way too many mistakes and right now and as a result of which I do not feel as though I’m any good at what I do. Feeling like this, only encourages more mistakes and negativity, and it’s a viscous cycle…

Now I’m not a big, ’follow-the-signs’ type person, but I can’t help but think these are the signs I should be listening to when it comes to making a decision about going back to school. In fact, I can’t help but think I’ve made up my mind and if it’s at all possible, I’m going. Now, to get my academic records from Dubai is where the problem is…

Despite all the bad that seems to be, there’s a been a lot of good as well… Last night while at work Lars came into my home office and handed me a card, signed by the dog. All it said inside was, “You have to go pee.” Call it coincidence, or call it whatever you will, but it was time for a bathroom break and coffee refill. I punched out of rotation and made my way to the bathroom, stopping for a long hug along the way. In his arms, he turned my face towards the door and my new elliptical. I shrieked with pure joy.

This man stops at nothing to please me. He has moments of stubborn arrogance and ego, but so do I. And knowing that, I do believe I’m the luckiest girl on earth with the man who was built just for me.